Thursday, April 29, 2004

for those of you who don't know, i share a blog with my sister so am not talking to self lah. but she drops by only on occasion. it's quite easy to tell the difference between her writing and mine, by the way.

to tor: no, didn't get it. you cow thing went very well though. it was my impromtu that was total crap. for the first 20 seconds i had no idea what i was saying. the topic was 'beauty pageants are a waste of time'. so expository, my downfall in English!

just realised haven't ranted on about 'the prince and me' here. it's an absurd movie that's total crap that made me feel like absolute shit when i came out of the theatre. it's the type of movie where if you don't have a boyfriend makes you want to grab any random hot guy off the street and snog him.

am so shallow. sigh.

i say, has anyone seen my copy of OotP? seem to have misplaced it/lent it to someone/both. hope tor didn't bring it to london..? also just realised that the book and the movie are coming out in about a month. cool. generally don't like gary oldman. Sirius Black CANNOT look like that. nor Lupin. but will see movie anyway, it is a Harry Potter movie after all.

random quiz time! hey, they're nice quizzes ok...

i'm in ravenclaw!

be sorted @ nimbo.net






Take the What High School
Stereotype Are You?
quiz.

I'm Destiny!
Which Member of the Endless Are You?

You are an angel that has been cast out of heaven,
and thrown to the earth. Almost being killed in
the process. But what doesn't kill you makes
you stronger, right? And the same rule applies
to you. When you suffer, it only makes you more
vicious, and powerful. You are an impressive
beinf. One never to be trifled with. You hate
all normal angels for this. You drink their
blood, to get back at the heavens that rejected
you.

Congrats, you are very smooth.

What Type Of Angel Have You Become?
brought to you by Quizilla

Your past life diagnosis
I don't know how you feel about it, but you were male in your last earthly incarnation.
You were born somewhere in the territory of modern Ontario around the year 1675.
Your profession was that of a dramatist, director, musician or bard.
Your brief psychological profile in your past life:
You always liked to travel and to investigate. You could have been a detective or a spy.
The lesson that your last past life brought to your present incarnation:
You should develop your talent for love, happiness and enthusiasm and you should distribute these feelings to all people.

Become a God or Goddess.
by zerogirl
Name:
God/Goddess ofThe Unknown
Element:Metal
Animal Companion:White tiger
Weak againstMetal
Weapon:None
Created with the ORIGINAL MemeGen!

Sunday, April 25, 2004

ok, done. he didn't ask who wrote your cow dream but i think he knows anyway (i mean, come on, it's daddy..!). then he gave me some pointers abt how one shouldn't memorise something but instead to simply try to tell a story. like how i can talk on the phone to someone for a bloody 2 hours and it's so difficult to write a 2 minute thing.

so like that lah. think am going to go with your cow thing, daddy said pple in school might not appreciate the gaiman one.
read daddy a bit of babycakes and he didn't even let me finish it! said something abt not reading word for word and interacting with the audience. then he did a demo and turned the whole thing inside out, took the idea instead of just reading the whole thing, 'teachers and friends, i'd like you, for a moment to just imagine, what if one day, all the animals disappeared?' or something along those lines. why couldn't i have inherited more funky useful stuff from daday? so in doing that, am not actually reading neil gaiman's work as such. but i supose i'll still write a letter to his agent abt it anyway.

ok, will get back to you in a while about reading yours.
I don’t know why I keep having this dream. Do I think of myself as a cow? Is this a cry for help, a fear of being trapped, or simply exams?(raise eyebrow here in ironic fashion) There is a slightly farcical quality to my dream. Farce is what you call funny things which are tragic, like charlie chaplin, or mr bean. Or clowns. My cows are not laughing, they are dying, but it is funny nonetheless. Like the laugh of a madman, the last man on earth.
http://www.loony-archivist.com/babycakes/page2.htm is a link to neil gaiman's short story 'babycakes'. highly recommended.

Wednesday, April 21, 2004

This is tor. I am stressed. This is what I wrote:

It begins in a small room made of mud—the roof is dry grass of the sort you find in deserts. The air is dry. The heat, everywhere. Through the small square hole in the wall, very high up, is a pink sky. But we are not on Mars, though the landscape be as barren. It is bright in the room. The walls are thick. It is very bright outside.

I am sprawled on the floor, my Sec 4 Chemistry book in front of me, reading. But I can’t, suddenly. I cannot turn the page. Upon it thrashes a thick brown coil, a great earthworm, it seems, all blood and muscle, in agony, covering my words with slime, blood and soil. To one side stands a black crow, its head jerking from side to side, taking sneaky little bites. I can see blood, pumping, through the skin of the worm, the little vessel in its centre gasping madly, as if for air.

Fascinated as I am, I must go on. I turn the page, pressing the paper firmly downwards with my hand until the juices run and squelch between my fingers. The door is on my right. A big, barnyard affair, wood nailed together. I draw the old-fashioned bolt, and push the door open to reveal a pink sky rushing to meet the horizon. Of dying cows.

The land is covered by dying cows. Dying cows everywhere, reaching to the horizon. It is a scene of visceral decay. I am overwhelmed with sadness for all these cows. I see a horrribly mutilated young calf, eyes covered with a white rheum, dried blood mixed with the dead bodies of flies, bloated from its flesh. I do not know why these cows were injured. I do not know why they are dying. But I am determined to save them.

But. I can’t! They are too many! Too many for me to carry to the nearest town. I pick up the young calf, and start walking.

I don’t know why I keep having this dream. Is my self image a cow? There is a slightly farcical quality to this, considering cows are usually used in funny imagery. Farce is what you call funny things which are tragic, like charlie chaplin, or mr bean. Or clowns. I think it is exam anxiety. Yesterday I dreamt I was in a gothic castle a la Harry Potter, except the courtyards were filled with statues of famous philosophers. And they could talk, a la Necroscope. They were all grey, but the light was yellow, like evening sun. I could see dust motes in the streams of light but it did not seem dusty. I was in a grey room looking out into the courtyard. I spoke to the figures there. There were many statues.

See? My dreams are all of me being trapped inside a small place, with a big place outside. The small place is always grey, or brown, or dark. And the outside space is infinite, or I can’t see the end. There are always lots of things outside, and it is bright and pretty. I can see their form, but their content, or meaning, is mysterious. I don’t feel trapped in the dream, because I can always go outside. But when I do, I don’t fully appreciate the things outside. Why? maybe i am just stressed.

Sunday, April 11, 2004

first up, happy easter everyone! today's easter mass went alright i think. hope your lentern sacrifices paid off, that is, if you're the type who does that sort of thing.

next, happy hide (pronounced HEE-dei) memorial day! *prances with chan (who's hollering 'rocket dive' lyrics) around shopping cart with lemons in*

ok, enough with the jap stuff.

computer man came on friday. that's it, my printer has gone totally kaput, from lack of use. it's barely a year old dammit! looks like attempts to print various school assignments were pretty pointless. ack. now have to get new one, *anguished cry* oh will this search for a good printer never stop!?

yes, have also been sick for about a week now. lungs half full of phlegm, sometimes have to stop what i'm doing half way, stare off into the distance and then start trying to hack up my respiratory system. once done being amused by dancing stars, have to do a bit of blinking before repeating process. good thing fever went down.

have chinese prelims tmr. wishing me luck is not going to do any good. going to blindfold self and jump off cliff while desperately trying to miss hitting the ground.

among a few other churches, went to Mary queen of the angels on thursday. aargh! i swear, want to move to that church even though it's in bukit batok, my future house will look like the columbarium there!

to les: wussup with you man? looking at your e-journal (of which i don't understand at least half of because of people/incidents am not familiar with and just plain cheem-ness), feel you surrounded by bad karma, regardless of even if you feel 'all right now'. want to meet up one day for coffee?

to liz: miss you too! especially our slacking at starbucks. might drop by lah, who knows? should catch up one day, take care dear.

to lll: (for full effect, imagine me saying this with all the stresses)*reclines in chair and raises an eyebrow disdainfully* which part of 'all that has been written' do you not understand?

have to go drink milk now. will try to remember not to throw away special offer/free milk/whatever sales gimmick thing.

Tuesday, April 06, 2004

changed layout. haven't time enough to fiddle with a fancy one but simple and plain works too. fixed tag board so now you can pretty much see the whole thing.

by the way, scrapped the links and random stuff 'cos honestly can't be bothered with blog etiquette. don't see why i should add rubbish links just because i'm supposed to. but if you ever need a link that used to be here then just ask, via tag.

comments please? thanks.

Monday, April 05, 2004

yarh larh, ok les, i'll write! *acknowledging nod to the smallness of the tag board, as well as all that has been written*

have been v. busy, during the march hols banders had to go back to school 5 days a week, 'cos of the concert larh. but had a bit of fun during the practices, at least. i'm definitely going to miss those (and the odd things we have to do like try to get the chime to shut up when we're in the bus by having 4 of us grab different sections of it) once us sec 4s are properly out of the band. not the ungodly hours though. but it's not over yet, we still have honours day to play for, ack.

please don't ask how the concert went. i can't exactly answer that question. or anything related to band, for that matter.

now that we've stopped for the exams, i don't feel so crushed anymore, am v. relieved to have more time. but sometimes i think even if there were 36 hours in a day it wouldn't be enough... i would spend alot of it messing around this blog you know. and reading others, of course. i'm sorry to those whose blogs i'm supposed to read, i hardly find time to come online and check my mail larh, wah lau.

am absolutely sick of doing them chinese tests. gave up on friday (also 'cos i was late) and only filled in multiple choice sections, what's the point? we'd have to do another one on monday anyway. but have been studying for prelims larh, getting through the chinese shou che book is like wading through a swamp, without any pants on.

we made a suggestion to mrs nix the other day, that we'd just do our english homework on our blogs ('cos it's some kind of reflection thing) and hey, that's generally what people do on their blogs most of the time anyway... right..? but it got turned down, of course. interesting concept though, i rather thought it would make me write in my blog more.

i want to change my skin, bleah, the computer guy said he'd save my folder for me the last time we reformatted the com but i don't know what happened, crap. had this really nice background, stained parchment looking, with inked designs at the side. ah crap.

i bought the budak pantai album! they are so cool, a local a capella band. if you want, i could lend you the album. they did 'my heart wil go on' (that's right, the celine dion one) with this funky country feel thing combined with... Star Wars..? yeah, it's cool. highly recommended. speaking of albums, am planning to buy the jason mraz (i don't know how to spell his surname, no. but it sounds something like that) one. he drinks, smokes and still sounds like honey, beautiful! and he writes his own songs too.

can't wait for maundy thursday, do so like the visiting churches thing. was just going to mention the churches i'll be visiting but suddenly have mrs Chu's voice in my head,' and they also tell them where they're going!'. hrm. so let's play 'i'm not a stupid teenager' then. in any case, *waves* that was for any teacher who just so happens to be here.

mum screaming at me for throwing the milk carton away. had to cut out portion of it to redeem free extra carton see, you know the type. so now she's banging things around 'cos she's angry. i do wish she'd stop.

alright, i'm off. will blog when something excititng happens i suppose.